Whispers from my Muse - "Be Careful What You Ask"

"Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?  So help you God?"

The bailiff acted a bit surprised when I didn't place my hand on the bible and say "I do", but anybody who really knew me would have been more surprised if I had.  "Your honor," I said as I turned my head to face him, "I understand the intention of this, but since I don't happen to believe in the God associated with that book, I'd be swearing a false oath.  I intend to tell the truth, and I'll swear a different oath to that effect if you wish, but I can't swear the one you normally require."

As I expected, they had alternatives of their own, I was hardly the first person to take a witness stand who didn't believe in the Christian God.  A few minutes later they accepted my oath on my own honor as valid and I sat down in the chair.

"Mr. Antoine?"

"Yes," I answered.

"Mr. Brian Wayne Antoine, the self proclaimed ArchMage of Earth?" asked the attorney.

"No," which made him pause.

"Isn't that your name?"

"It is."

"Are you the ArchMage of this planet?"

"Yes, I am."

"Then why did you deny it just now?"

"I didn't deny either my name or the fact I'm the current ArchMage of Earth," I told him with a grin that I hoped made it clear what I thought of him.  "I am not however, self proclaimed, I was given that title by the previous holder of it, as that person was given it by every ArchMage that came before them."

"And who gave you that title?"

Yeah, right, like I was suddenly going to answer a question that I'd been refusing to answer for years, just because I was on the witness stand.  Instead, I made a point of cleaning one of my fingernails.

"Mr. Antoine, are you refusing to answer my question?"

"Yes, I am.  I took an oath to tell the truth, but I did not say I'd answer every question put to me."

"Your honor, the witness is ..."

"Refusing to compromise the safety of innocent people," I finished for him as I turned again to face the judge.

The judge looked at me like he'd like to throw me in jail for contempt, and truth be told I actually did feel a bit of contempt for the whole proceeding I'd been talked into participating in, but he held his tongue.  "Mr. Antoine, what do you mean by 'compromise the safety'?"

I thought about trying his patience further, but decided not to.  "Your honor, it is a well established fact that any Mage who reveals their identity becomes the target of religious extremists.  The whole point of this trial is about whether the defendant sitting over there is guilty of the murder of several innocent bystanders who were standing too close to me when the bomb he intended to kill me with was detonated."

Yeah, both attorneys came unglued at that point.  They yelled at the judge, each other, the defense attorney yelled at me a couple of times, I just sat there and waited for them to settle what ever meaningless legal point they wanted to fight about.

"Mr. Antoine," the judge said with a scowl when the arguing had quieted down.  "You will confine yourself to answering the questions asked of you and will refrain from offering unsubstantiated opinions."

"Only the truth?"

"And nothing but the Truth," he told me.

"Ok then, as a point of truth I point out that this court has allowed two members of the religious group known as 'Purity Through Fire' into this court while armed, which proves my point about Mages becoming targets if their identity is known."  My defensive shields, which had actually be there since I'd walked into the courthouse, flared into the visible light range.  "That person in the brown jacket in the back of the room carried a handgun in with the knowledge of the guard outside, though he hasn't realized yet that the firing pin is missing."  I held out my hand and dropped the firing pin onto the floor in front of the witness stand.  "The lady in the rather garish hat in the second row has a bomb in her purse, although if she tries to detonate it, the only person she'll kill is herself."

Suffice to say that all hell broke loose in the courtroom.  The idiot in back apparently didn't believe me about the firing pin and stood up, pulled his gun and tried to fire at me.  The gun barely cleared his jacket before he vanished with a loud *pop*.  The lady didn't believe me either, but the shield I'd thrown around her confined the blast and the resulting gore to an area slightly larger than she was.  The photographers had a field day, but then they always did where I was concerned.

I doubt the judge heard me when I glanced his direction through the chaos around us and said, "It's not paranoia if they really are out to get you."